Gainer-Friendly Fast Food: How to Make the Best Selections for Weight Gain

For anyone looking to gain some serious weight, fast food can be a goldmine of calorie-dense, indulgent meals. However, navigating the fast food menu to find the best options for weight gain takes a bit of strategy. While most fast food is likely to satisfy your cravings and calorie needs, not all meals are created equal—some are light and less filling, while others are packed with calories, fat, and protein, making them ideal for feedees looking to grow quickly. This guide will help you determine how to choose the best gainer-friendly fast food meals, with a few examples to guide you along the way.

Layering Up

When scanning a fast food menu, focus on meals that combine several layers of ingredients, especially those rich in fat and calories. The key is to look for items that pile on multiple components—such as extra patties, cheese, bacon, and creamy sauces—since each layer adds more calories, making it easier to consume a large amount of energy in a single meal.

Think of a double or triple cheeseburger with extra bacon, multiple types of cheese, and generous amounts of mayo—or in other words fat on fat on fat. The combination of fatty ingredients not only boosts calorie content but also enhances the flavor, making it more appealing (and addicting) to eat. Toppings like crispy onion rings, avocado, or fried eggs can take it even further, providing additional fats and textures for the fatties with more refined palettes.

Similarly, loaded burritos are another excellent choice. A burrito stuffed with rice, beef, cheese, sour cream, and beans offers a dense combination of fats, proteins, and carbs, ensuring you’re taking in plenty of calories in one cozy swaddled pocket of food. Choosing extra fillings like guacamole, salsa, or fried chips like Fritos will increase the calorie count even more.

If burgers and burritos aren’t your thing, you can also opt for fries with cheese, bacon, sour cream, chili, gravy, cheese curds, anything! Same with nachos or even pizza. The more layers and the more toppings a dish has, the better it is for you…feedism speaking. If you’re trying to eat a bit healthier (lame), you can opt for loaded sandwiches and wraps. Even fast food salads can be turned into calorie-rich meals if you go for options with full-fat dressings, crispy chicken, bacon, cheese, nuts, and creamy add-ons.

Example: A Triple Whopper with Cheese from Burger King, which layers three beef patties, cheese, ketchup, mayo, and a selection of veggie toppings, makes it an ideal choice for gainer goals. A single one of these burgers packs in a whopping (pun intended) 1300 calories…hottt.

Sides & Combos

While the main meal might be tempting, sides are a crucial part of building a calorie-packed fast food experience. Fries, onion rings, mozzarella sticks and chips are all great choices to add hundreds of extra calories. If the restaurant offers loaded versions of these sides with extra toppings like cheese, bacon, or chili—then even better, for obvious reasons.

Sides help round out the meal and make it easy to increase your calorie intake without overwhelming your appetite. You could also skip the sides and double down on more entrees…but then why not add sides to that too? Then replace those sides with entrees and add sides again, then—

Getting a combo meal tacks on a side (usually some version of fried potatoes) and a drink to your main meal at a small discount. Most fast food restaurants will offer different portion sizes for these combos, so always aim for the largest option. When available, combo meals are the perfect way to maximize your calories, the drink being particularly important, as upgrading to a milkshake or other high-calorie beverage can significantly increase your overall intake.

Example: Hot chicken, hot chicken, what combo you pickin? IYKYK. Raising Cane’s Caniac Combo comes with six chicken tenders, two servings of their famous Cane’s sauce, a large drink, and three sides—fries, Texas toast, and coleslaw for a total of up to 2040 calories. It’s common practice for customers to switch out the coleslaw for something else…because it’s coleslaw.

Choose Drinks Wisely

Any good fatass or feeder knows that drinks are just as important as the food itself—so don’t skip over the drink menu. Grab a soda, fruit juice, or cream-heavy blended coffee if you’re hitting morning drive-thrus (early pig gets the breakfast menu treats). Choose whatever is your favorite, or simply whichever one has the most calories.

Now let’s say you're a good piggy that knows there are much fattier options. Along with your standard soft drink, which adds mostly sugar and little else, opt for rich, creamy beverages like milkshakes, smoothies, or frappés. These drinks are packed with calories, especially milkshakes, which contain a blend of fat and sugar that ensures you're getting a calorie boost that a regular soda just can't provide.

Shakes are a great opportunity to sip on calories while eating, you’ll end up consuming more than you might with solid food alone. Since liquid calories tend to be easier to handle, you can pair a milkshake with a heavy meal and still fit in more calories without feeling overly stuffed. Not to mention that a sweet creamy break between bites of salty, savory, greasy food can be just what’s needed to keep eating through a heavy fast food feast. If you want to go all out, customize your milkshake with toppings like whipped cream, chocolate syrup, caramel drizzle, or even candy pieces. Some fast food chains even offer shakes blended with cookies, brownies, or peanut butter, further increasing the fat and sugar content while giving you a deliciously decadent experience.

Example: A large chocolate milkshake from McDonald’s has 800 calories, while a large Coke only has 290 calories. Which do you choose? *jeopardy music* What is…both.

Customize Customize Customize

Many fast food chains offer customization options, which is a great opportunity to enhance your meal with extra fattening ingredients, making it far more calorie-dense. Whether or not you’re a picky piggy, taking advantage of these options allows you to transform a standard order into a high-calorie feast that’s tailored exactly to your taste.

Never pass up the opportunity to slap an extra patty or slice of cheese on your burger, double or triple up on portions of steak or chicken in your burrito, or trade a fruit cup for hash browns to go with your breakfast platter. Customizations like these are perfect for maximizing your calorie intake in one meal. It isn’t limited to just the major ingredients, either. Adding seemingly small extras like avocado, fried onions, or crispy bacon makes a big difference. Even asking for light or no ice in your drink can free up more space for precious, precious calories.

Example: Customize a Five Guys Bacon Cheeseburger by adding extra cheese, extra bacon, grilled onions, jalapeños, or whatever else you want for an easy 1060+ calories. One of their milkshakes starts at 670 calories and can be customized (for free) with mix-ins like bacon, vanilla, peanut butter, cherry, chocolate, Oreo creme, strawberry, salted caramel, coffee, malted milk, banana, and Oreo cookie pieces. Oh, and can come with or without whipped cream. They truly are God’s gift to the world.

Sharing is Caring…sike

One of the easiest ways to choose enough fast food for a heavy set individual is to simply get a menu meal meant for multiple people. This can be a party pack of a dozen tacos, a family meal of fried chicken and sides, a large pizza (or two), or simply a “sharable” amount of chicken nuggets. These meals are loaded with calories and make it simple to consume large quantities without much effort or thought, perfect for the mindless lazy feedees or feeders who just need to pick something quickly and easily. In some cases you may even have the advantage of grazing through various items without feeling restricted to just one dish. Plus, how hot is it knowing that your meal is specifically meant to feed an entire family, but instead only you will be feasting on it? Greedy.

These meals can also be more cost effective, like buying in bulk. Instead of spending $40 on all the items separately, a party pack may only cost you $35, offering you valuable savings, just like a meal deal or combo. A very large combo.

Example: A Meat Lover’s Pizza from Pizza Hut combines rich meat toppings with a carb-heavy crust. Satisfying, fattening, and a perfect snack for one person. Pair it with cheesy bread and wings for a full, balanced meal.

Don’t Forget the Condiments

Condiments are so underrated. They’re often overlooked, but can be a hidden source of extra calories that make a significant impact on your fast food order. Even though they seem like small additions, sauces like mayonnaise (for your burger or sandwich), ranch dressing (for your pizza), cheese sauce (for your nacho fries), and barbecue sauce (for your nuggies and tendies) are loaded with fats and sugars, making them incredibly calorie-dense. Just a few spoonfuls can add hundreds of extra calories to your meal without taking up much room in your cute wittle tummy. Even more common condiments like ketchup and mustard, while less calorific than their creamier counterparts, still contribute to your overall intake—especially when used generously. So next time you’re at a fast food restaurant, look through their selections of condiments and sauces, and ask for extras.

Example: A serving of Wingstop’s ranch has 324 calories, their blue cheese has 325, and their honey mustard has 390. Now imagine going through two or three of them johns, on top of your wings and fries…damn.

Abuse the System

To take your fast food game even further, consider signing up for rewards programs offered by your favorite fast food chains. These programs often provide exclusive deals, discounts, and even free food items that can help you save some money while indulging in high-calorie meals. Many fast food apps also feature special promotions and combo upgrades, making it easier to access more food at a lower cost. The added bonuses can quickly turn a regular meal into a feast, perfect for anyone focused on gaining blubber. Before you head through a drive thru or place a delivery order (because you’re perfectly fat and lazy), download a restaurant’s app or visit their website to see what rewards or discounts you could get, even for just signing up. The further your dollar stretches, the more you can eat!